What's Actually Happening in Your Brain During Divorce—and How to Fix It You're not imagining it. The brain fog, the inability to focus, the way you keep replaying painful conversations on an endless loop—there's actual neuroscience behind what you're experiencing during divorce. I sat down with neuroscientist Dr. Nicole A. Tetreault to understand exactly what's happening in our brains during one of life's most stressful transitions. What she shared wasn't just fascinating—i

If you’re heading into the holiday season while navigating divorce or separation, this time of year can feel anything but merry. That mix of gratitude and complete overwhelm? Totally normal. Dread and anxiety? Yup, normal. The holidays during or after divorce feel different. But here’s what I want you to know: different doesn’t have to mean bad. Subscribe to The Divorce Planner's weekly newsletter and get divorce prep tips and tools delivered right to your inbox! Whether it’s

"Some days I feel strong. Other days, I don't know who I am anymore." Who you get to be after divorce is up to YOU. This is one of the most common things I hear from clients—and it takes me right back to my own divorce. The hardest part wasn't just losing the relationship. It was losing me in the version of "we" that I had been living for years: the routines, the role of being a wife, the role of being a mother, being in "just trying to survive" mode, and having no idea who I

How treating yourself with kindness becomes your most powerful tool for navigating divorce with clarity and strength Treat yourself with the same compassion you would give to your best friend. When people talk about protecting your energy during divorce, they often suggest rest, long walks, or bubble baths. And while those things help, they don't go deep enough. Because the biggest energy drain isn't always your ex, your lawyer, or your to-do list -- it's your inner critic. Y

There's no better feeling that knowing you can trust your gut. When clients first reach out to me, they usually start with some version of this: "I don't know if I should get divorced. How do I figure out if it's the right decision?" But here's what I've learned after coaching hundreds of people through this exact question—deep down, they already know. They're not really asking me to help them decide. They're asking for permission to trust what they already feel. This hit me

Why Your Marriage Ending Might Be Your Best Life Beginning Your next chapter gets to be written by YOU. When you're facing divorce after 45, it feels like everything is falling apart. The life you built, the future you planned, the person you thought you were—suddenly none of it makes sense anymore. I hear this from clients all the time: "I should be grateful for what I have, so why do I feel so empty?" Here's what I want you to consider: what if this is your moment to finall

When you're going through divorce, it's not just your living situation that's changing—your entire relationship with yourself is being tested. I've been there, and I know how easy it is to become your own worst critic during this time. "I should have seen the signs," "I'm a failure," "I'm not good enough," "I've ruined everything"—sound familiar? Self-compassion during divorce isn't a luxury—it's the foundation that helps you make clearer decisions, heal faster, and build res

When you've internalized rage for long periods of time, or even if it just snuck up on you, addressing it can feel really scary. There's a common narrative around divorce that suggests we should "keep calm and carry on." Be reasonable. Don't rock the boat. Stay positive. Handle the business side efficiently. And while yes, there is absolutely a time and place for pragmatic, level-headed decision-making—especially when dividing assets or creating parenting plans—this approach

When Your Heart Breaks: A Guide to Navigating Romantic Rejection Rejection sucks. Whether you've been unexpectedly dumped, received an "I don't feel the same way" response to your heartfelt confession, or find yourself newly single after years of marriage, the pain of romantic rejection can feel overwhelming and all-consuming. "When it comes to being rejected in matters of the heart, it's common to replay the moment: 'Why wasn't I enough? What did I do wrong?'," says Dr. Elen

Instead of fearing quiet, embrace it for strength. Have you noticed how the world seems to get louder during divorce? Between well-meaning friends offering advice, necessary but draining legal discussions, and that constant chatter in your own mind, finding moments of genuine peace can feel impossible. But here's something fascinating I've discovered: embracing silence might be exactly what we need during this challenging transition. Subscribe to The Divorce Planner newslett

Finding your footing during divorce can feel overwhelming, especially as a mother. In this powerful 25-minute conversation, The Divorce Planner founder, divorce prep coach Alex Beattie , speaks with transformational coach Leah Marie Mazur to explore essential strategies for mothers navigating this challenging life transition. You'll discover practical advice, emotional support, and a roadmap for moving forward with confidence. We combined our expertise to offer a compassionat

Setting divorce goals and taking action sets you up to not only survive, but thrive after divorce. No one thinks they'll be kicking off a new year having to prepare for one of life's biggest challenges. Look, the journey through divorce marks a significant life transition, but with strategic planning and clear goals, 2025 can become a year of empowerment and positive transformation. Why would you set divorce goals and take action? Because when you take the steps to prepare be

You know those conversations that just light you up inside? The ones where you walk away feeling more inspired, more understood, and maybe even a little bit lighter? That's exactly what happened when I chatted with Hillary Livingston Giddings and Bethany M. Pace from Sincerely Divorced . (Watch our full chat in the video above - trust me, you won't want to miss their infectious energy!) Subscribe to The Divorce Planner newsletter  and get divorce prep tips and tools delivered

Transform Your Divorce Journey: Expert Insights & Empowerment In the powerful conversation below, divorce preparation expert Alex Beattie  joins forces with renowned "comeback coach" Joanna Nisioti  to reveal how divorce can become your gateway to profound personal transformation. Subscribe to The Divorce Planner'newsletter  and get divorce prep tips and tools delivered right to your inbox! Key Takeaways from This Expert Discussion: How to rediscover yourself after feeling lo

Simple self-care actions pay off big time during and after divorce. Even in the best of circumstances divorce is a difficult and emotionally draining time in life. It encompasses a variety of feelings, major life choices, and necessary adaptations that can impact your mental health. That's why its essential to focus on self-care during this time to help effectively manage the emotional tsunami you're dealing with. If you're thinking, "My spouse and I have been ready for the c

Peacefully living with a soon-to-be-ex during a separation or divorce IS possible. Cohabitating with a spouse during separation or divorce is not an ideal situation for many, but sometimes it's an unavoidable reality. Whether it’s due to financial constraints, the welfare of children, or simply the need for a gradual transition, sharing a living space as you’re severing marital ties is a challenge that many couples face. Practical Reasons for Cohabitation During Separation F

One of my favorite parts of The Divorce Planner's platform is the ongoing interview series I have with a myriad of divorce professionals. From divorce attorneys to mediators, to financial planners to therapist and more, bringing you valuable insights and tips that make your divorce journey easier is my mission. The bedrock of The Divorce Planner's coaching philosophy is that there is an emotional side to divorce and a business side, and that they need to be separated and addr

Surrendering During Hard Times Can Be The Most Empowering Action You Can Take One of the hardest things about going through a divorce is feeling out of control -- Control over your future, control over the outcome of your divorce, control over how the world sees you, and control over how you see yourself. When I was going through a really deep and dark time of grieving and healing, a friend shared with me what has become a favorite meditation episode by Sarah Blondin from he

Taking steps to build emotional resilience during your split is a game-changer. Going through a divorce can feel like riding an uncontrollable roller coaster of emotions. The highs are so high, and the lows can feel so low. There is no magic pill that makes us brave or tough times easier, but there are ways you can cultivate resilience and gratitude, which are proven to help people thrive through difficult times and emerge even stronger. Subscribe to The Divorce Planner newsl

No one goes into a separation or divorce without doing a lot of introspection and self-assessment. Ask yourself these questions ASAP.