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What To Expect When Meeting With Divorce Attorneys & Mediators

When people are considering a divorce, one of the first questions they have is "When is the right time to start meeting with divorce attorneys?".


The truth is, once you come to the point in your marriage where you know that divorce is the right next step for you, you should start gathering references for local family law attorneys (AKA divorce attorneys).

I know, I know -- you're in the throes of feeling ALL of the feels, but you're going to need to focus your attention to things that have an direct effect on your future, so the sooner you start educating yourself, the better.

After you've taken the first step and gathered all of your essential documents, prepared a list of your assets, and figured out your financial realities, it’s time to consult a legal professional. Not sure where to start the prep process? This digital bundle walks you through everything you need to do!


One of the best ways to educate yourself about what the divorce process is to start meeting with divorce attorneys and mediators. You should be making the most of this time by preparing as much as possible to discuss in advance of your consultations.


Being ready to make the most of your time when meeting with divorce attorneys and mediators not only will save you time and money, it will give you clarity about what to expect as you move forward.

Preparing in advance of interviewing potential attorneys and mediators (which are sometimes free, ask first!) will position you to make the most of your time so you can ask questions based on the realities of your specific situation.

When I went through my own search for a mediator, I quickly found out that picking the right mediator or divorce attorney is like Goldilocks trying to find the right bed.
  • The first mediator my ex and I sat down with was an older man with a blunt “tell-it-like-it-is” style. He went through his qualifications with us like a grizzled coach, and then mapped out a game plan on a wipe board that looked like a football play. (Too hard.)

  • The next mediator we met with had a Mother Earth vibe. Her process was to talk through each and every emotion me and my spouse had about every little detail. (Too soft.)

  • The last was a plain spoken woman who laid out a clear timeline, set reasonable expectations and encouraged each of us to make sure we remembered that even though we were getting a divorce, we shared two kids and shouldn't let the process sour us on each other since we will be parent partners for the rest of our lives. (Just right.)


Whether you're meeting with a lawyer or mediators the goal is the same, find someone who reflects your values and presents themselves in a way that makes you feel comfortable being in the trenches with them. Not unlike dating, you're trying to get a feel of who is going to be a good fit for you.


Not sure how to prepare for consultations with family law attorneys or mediators? Get The Divorce Planner's FREEBIE guide 24 Questions To Ask A Divorce Attorney Or Mediator at the bottom of this post.


During this challenging time, remember that you're not alone — The Divorce Planner is here to support and empower you. At The Divorce Planner, our mission is to make divorce planning accessible to everyone, providing guidance, resources, and encouragement.


Want to take your next steps with financial clarity and confidence? Book a consultation with divorce prep coach Alex Beattie (A.K.A. The Divorce Planner).






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